Why you can’t find your purpose
Have you ever asked yourself what is your purpose in life? Or just what is the purpose of life? Then, as you find that you struggle to find an answer, you batter yourself with negative and self-belittling thoughts. I often find myself wishing I had one clear, big purpose that I could invest all of my time and energy into and make a world-changing impact. Somehow in that, I would feel good about myself. I would feel successful and fulfilled and my legacy, my life, would have the meaning I so desire.
What if I told you that you can have the meaning you desire in your life, but it isn’t the way Hollywood, Disney, professional athletes, creator culture, or social media have taught us it should happen? Counter to the surface presentation of success and fame and fulfillment, if you look at any of these popular success models you would quickly find that there is a lot of grindingly hard work that all of these people do every day.
“The most successful people in this world give purpose to all the little things in every day.”
But here is the trick that the devil doesn’t want us to learn. The most successful people in this world give purpose to all the little things in every day. The hockey athlete eats a certain way, not just for the taste but also for the health benefits and how it will affect their performance on the ice. The actor or singer gets up and recites, “A Big Black Beetle Bit a Big Black Bug,” with precision pronunciation not just because it is fun to say but because it exercises and stretches a critical part of their body that they need to fulfill their dream.
You got me. You are right. These people already have their purpose. They dream of being an athlete or an actor or a singer. If you had that kind of purpose then you could do what they do to become successful. Sorry to say but only some of the people with those dreams ever reach the level of success they desire and even less find fulfillment in the little bit of success they do have. Those who find fulfillment in the big purpose of their lives find fulfillment in the little purposes of their lives. But here is your classic chicken or egg conundrum. Which came first, the big purpose or the small purposeful routines? Or maybe I can put it this way; Was it because David was the King of Isreal that made him faithful? Or was it that he was already living faithfully that he was given the purpose to become King David? Or Mary, mother of Jesus, was she pregnant with Jesus and then became faithful or was she faithful and thus chosen to bear the Son of God?
Let us look at two passages that will help give greater insight. In Luke 16 we find a passage about the Shrewd Manager. Here we find a manager about to lose his job so he goes and cuts all the people owing money to his master in half. This is to make sure when he doesn’t have a job these people will treat him like a friend and welcome him into their homes. The master then commends the manager saying, “Whoever can be trusted with very little can also be trusted with much, and whoever is dishonest with very little will also be dishonest with much. So if you have not been trustworthy in handling worldly wealth, who will trust you with true riches?” (Luke 16:10-11) What the author is saying as it relates to purpose is that if you want a big personal purpose for your life you need to be faithful with the little personal activities in your life.
“Whoever can be trusted with very little can also be trusted with much”
Going to work or school? Can you inject greater purpose into that activity? Is it a 10-minute drive or could it be a 30-minute walk? Could that 30-minute walk have the purpose of getting you to work and get you your daily exercise and be a time of prayer or worship you know you need? The cool thing about this is that not only do you turn a 10-minute activity into a 30-minute activity but you can actually do all three at the same time. If you will, 30 minutes of exercise, 30 minutes of prayer, and a 10-minute drive now in one 30-minute activity? That is 70 minutes of things you need to do every day done in 30 minutes. In the business world, this would be called a great ROI (Return on Investment). Practically, and back to the verses, as you are faithful with this little change you now have directly been given 40 minutes in your day to relax or do something else.
As a Christian, this is called being faithful with what you have been given. Being faithful with the little everyday activities in your day. Injecting purpose into these things you will soon find that your life is filled with purpose. Now this doesn’t yet answer the question of what your Big purpose is. First, we need to check in on the difference between your Christian Purpose and your Big Personal Purpose.
Christian Purpose and Personal Purpose
I am not going to dig deep into your Christian Purpose. I trust that on some levels you already have an understanding of this. To Glorify God, to bring everyone you have a connection with closer into a relationship with Jesus. Ultimately, to enter the presence of God in the fullness and in the Kingdom of God in all its glory bringing all the people you can with you. You can explore that more if you want. There are different ways to say it and to think about it. The part that we want to hinge on is that as a Christian, you have a Christian purpose. That purpose can be found in the Bible.
But for you, personally. What is your specific role within God’s kingdom? To be a preacher, pastor, or evangelist? Or is it to be landlord or a nurse or an engineer or a waitress or a dancer? And in each of those career-centric purposes, what’s the point of them? And here is the tricky part of this all. What do you find purpose in? Back to the activity of driving to work. Getting to work is a purpose, but just driving to work isn’t purposeful. Driving to work and choosing to pray has a greater purpose. Walking to work, praying, and exercising starts to make that task more purposeful. The same goes for your job or your activity. It does have a purpose, to make money. What would it look like to make it purposeful? To do your job with integrity? What does that mean for you, integrity? Or to make one person's day extra special every day of work? Can you inject positivity into your workplace? Can you add a Christian purpose? Even if you are not allowed to talk specifically about God, can you be extra intentional to be gracious, or loving, or forgiving to your coworkers? Suddenly your regular activities become purposeful.
“The only thing that counts is faith expressing itself through love.”
Still, this doesn’t answer what your Big Personal Purpose. Specifically, it doesn’t, no. The last part of Galatians 5:6 reads, “The only thing that counts is faith expressing itself through love.” Your Big Personal Purpose may be missing in your life. As a Life Coach, I would love to help you find yours, but here, in a blog, I can’t get that specific with you. But, also, as a Life Coach, I am more interested in giving you the tools to find your own purpose, to know that the Holy Spirit is and has been working in your life. What we can do here, and I think you have already heard it, is give you one proven tool to help you find your purpose.
That tool is to be faithful with the little things. Adding purpose to the little things makes them purposeful and making the little things purposeful makes your day purposeful. And that gives purpose to your life. Is that enough? Or do you still need that Big Personal Purpose? It may be for you. What I can tell you is that you won’t likely be given that purpose unless you are faithful with the little things. You can go on a purpose-finding retreat or a soul-searching adventure, but if you are not faithful with the little things, intentionally giving them purpose and living it out, then you can not be trusted with a bigger purpose.
You have a purpose, a Big Personal Purpose. To discover that, find little intentional purposes in the little activities of life. Making dinner? Do it with your kid letting them make a mess and mistakes. Making dinner turns into a fun, joy-filled, relationship-building activity that is mildly about making the meal and more about the person you are doing it with. If the meal fails…order in. Vacuuming, get your worship music going in your ears, dance, sing and worship. Driving alone to the big city for something? Invite someone to join you just cause. Love on them.
Giving a task a greater purpose beyond that task's basic motivation is called being purposeful. And this lifestyle of being purposeful is the key to making your life filled with purpose.
“Giving a task a greater purpose beyond that task’s basic motivation is called being purposeful. And this lifestyle of being purposeful is the key to making your life filled with purpose.”
